Along the Journey

Cancer Doesn't Get To

The words, "You have cancer," hit with such force that the wind gets knocked out of you. You're so disoriented you can't seem to get your footing. Everything spins faster than you can control, and you just want it all to stop and go back to how things were before this intruder barged into your life so rudely and abruptly. If you find yourself here, I’m sorry. This blog is for you, wherever you are on your journey.

Some of you may be at the beginning, grasping for any sense of hope and calm that you can find. Some of us find ourselves in the middle—tired and weary from treatment and scans; the waiting has become just another part of life. Or maybe you’re over your treatments, and now you’re supposed to go back to life like nothing really happened. There are those, too, who will be the bravest of us all and be required to say goodbye to their loved ones because of this cruel disease. No matter where you are in this journey, one thing is true: Cancer doesn’t get to. Just sit in that for a moment, especially if the wind is still knocked out of you. Because no, friend, Cancer doesn’t get to. We have a choice—actually, we have several—and they are the most important ones that we will ever make on this journey.

How we show up…

Cancer cannot dictate how we show up for the people we love today. Simply being present and engaged is a gift to those around us. Allowing the ones we love to walk beside us, to hold us, and, in return, holding them. The opportunity we have to deepen the bonds with those in our circle is a gift. To walk this journey holding the hands of those dearest to us is how we say no: Cancer doesn’t get to!

Choosing gratitude…

Even in the uncertainty, I still can choose gratitude. Sunshine and fall leaves. A warm drink or a comfy blanket. There are gifts all around us, even in the midst of great sadness and illness. Being grateful does not eliminate the pain; it’s simply a balm that, when applied liberally, can take away some of the sting. The more you look, the more you’ll find. My husband and I sat down one night and named 60 good things we got from this journey, and we took the bold stance and said no, cancer doesn’t get to! I encourage you to grab a journal or notebook and write down some of the blessings you see all around you right now!

Knowing you're valued

I saved the best for last because my hope is that you can place a flag on this mountain today and claim a place for yourself. Cancer doesn’t get to define you. There is only One who gets to do that, and it is the One who made you. Psalms 139:14 – Body and soul, I am marvelously made! When you are frustrated with your body, when you feel run down and exhausted, when the blood work doesn’t reflect what you would like, when the scan comes back less than desirable, or when you can’t turn your mind off, remember this truth: you are marvelously made, and He has good plans for you. (Jeremiah 29:11)

Will you dare to believe with me that God can use even this to accomplish His work in and through you? It’s hard to see it, I know. When my diagnosis came and the tests revealed that it was worse than we originally thought, when my echo showed heart issues, when I was quarantined at home because my immune system was no longer functioning, and the shock of it all brought our marriage to a breaking point—I cried tears, so many tears. I wrestled and prayed and yelled and begged. But it was there that I was held and met by my Savior. He wasn’t put off by my questions, fear, and anger. Instead, He came closer and met me in it, and once again, this truth surfaced:  Cancer doesn’t get to…

So, it’s from this place that I write. Not because I know how all this works, but because in my mess I was met, held, and shown a life that was so much bigger than I could have ever imagined. I had to go through it, and so do you, friend. As much as we want to circumvent the ordeal and go back to our old normal, it’s a gift to be able to reset, adjust our mindset, and discover a new normal that is so much better than what was. I humbly ask you to join me on this journey and be strengthened together. There truly is beauty in the midst of all of this!

Tracey